Describing a mood swing
If your partner is having a mood swing, if you have no idea what is happening, and that if you love her. I’d like to bring you through a mood swing roller coaster from her point of view. Maybe my story would help you understand her better.
There’s five stages.
First stage: The trigger
I was having a vacation with husband. We haven’t been to anywhere for the last five years. Just the two of us, as couple. The vacation wasn’t even far away, it’s only Genting highland. A golf trip.
I was more excited than I originally thought. Maybe that’s why it drives me fast and high to my mood swing ride.
I thought it’ll be a quick overnight stay, so I packed very little, underestimating the menstrual pad I’m going to need, which I am going to regret later.
Everything went well, we had expensive lunch and he paid for it. The weather was chilly and comfortable. It would be a perfect holiday.
If I am to describe my happiness from 1 to 10 right now, its a 10. The highest point of the roller coaster.
Until the trigger came.
He announced that a female friend would join us for dinner.
No. That’s totally not in my plan. That’s totally different from a romantic dinner I had imagine, one that I had look forward to.
Stage 2: Hatred
I felt hatred towards that female friend. I started by enlarging all her flaws. The hatred grew and grew.
#how a mood swing feels
After 30 minutes, I decided to share to my husband what I’m feeling. I told her I don’t like this girl. I was trying to tell him how I feel aiming to dissolve the hatred. I wanted to resume my happy holiday mood the soonest possible.
I expected him to say something close like: “You are right. I should be more careful when I go out with her next time. I’ll let you know if we’re dining alone and share with you the content of our conversation.”
He did just the opposite, he started to defend her.
“She doesn’t have any female friends. All her friends are male. That’s part of her charm.”
I could feel smoke coming out of my head when he said the word “charm”.
Fuck the charm, she’s a bitch.
Stage 3: Low self esteem, self-doubt
I switched from strong hatred to low self-esteem. I started to compare myself with that girl. I looked at my chipped manicure. My imperfect BMI that doesn’t point to underweight. My short hair. Short hair that went under the rain! The failing curls. I didn’t have my Clark shoes. She’s so perfect, did he marry me because he couldn’t marry her? I hate myself. I hate that I ruined our precious holiday. I didn’t even want to move because of the stupid period cup I’m wearing. Everything was so wrong.
We checked in at the hotel.
I was waiting for words of comfort. Niente.
I tried to sleep it off. It gets better but very soon it spiralled back down.
I said improper things. I stirred things up. Begging for words of comfort, begging for someone to tell me I’m perfect, im the perfect wife, nobody can replace me. Or a silent hug at least. I wait and wait, the tension was only getting worse, again, nothing.
Stage 4: Extreme sadness
Now not only im sad, he’s furious too.
I didn’t want to eat dinner. Cz he likes skinny girl like that bitch. I’m too fat I should starve myself.
I started tearing and he didn’t care.
After a solid 5 hours, I starting to realise it’s a mood swing. Most probably happening because of the menstrual cycle. Or hungriness.
I knew I can solve this, by first going to a shower.
At hard time like this, going to a shower is difficult. I don’t know how to describe it, but turning the shower head on was the hardest task at the moment.
I sweat easily, so I decided to apply my old ways. I need to walk a few miles and sweat, then I will take the shower.
Stage 5: Husband helps
#how a mood swing feels
I can’t see from his point of view
What he did next, helped to end the chaos
- He bought me tasty and overpriced dinner regardless ( I was on a low carb diet, he managed to get me a 50 bucks salad), even though he’s still mad
- He didn’t roar or shout at me the entire time.
My shower also worked its magic. I took an icy shower at Genting Highland.
The seven hours mood swing ride, finally halted to an end.
When mood swing hits, I am a person in a dark snake pit, I can only be saved if someone is willing to help. I can’t do this on my own.
The possible reason I was experiencing the mood swing:
- mentrual cycle
- I was on a low carb diet
- I have regular anxiety attack