The Cons of DINK, Double Income, No Kids

Surely, the advantages are very well sung.

The freedom, the mobility in making plans, the responsibility of raising a good person.

There’s so much pros to the DINK lifestyle, I can only think of very few disadvantages that accompanied the decision.

Speaking from my own experience, there’s only two major cons to double income, no kids (DINK) lifestyle.

1. The Incomplete of Life cycle

Seeing our grandparents and parents getting older, we would never have a chance to welcome young, energetic, sprouting life.

Imagine changing a diapers for your 90 years old stroke granny vs changing cute S size diapers for a 6 months old, I believe the later is less depressing.

I also think that 40 years old me would not bring as much laughter to my parents compared to my 4 years old niece in double braids, who just learned to count to 100.

2. Insecurity

Us woman had our last chance to have kids at mid forties. Sure, life before forty are damn wonderful. We could scuba dive a week at the most breathtaking dive site in Malaysia, worry about nothing, maybe except for financials.

When all the similar activities being done, when our physical energy finally do not catch up, would we regret our no kids decision?

The constant fear of regret

When we’re at our ups, things are fantastic.

Then we forgot our coffee on Sunday morning and anxiety hit. Women are more prone to various level of anxiety and depressed feelings. The fear of regret might creep into our mind during these ugly moments.

– That you will start telling yourself, you could be an above average parent

Or at the least, pass on the good stuff. You believe you have the good quality as a human, the feelings get extra strong when you see unloved child, bad parents.

“I would have act differently.”

– Are we endangering our relationship?

If our husbands regret, they can always have someone younger to bare their kids. And that he only regret at age of 48? When the last of his friends got married and expecting his tried-really-hard IVF baby?

– It’s not regret, it’s fear of regret

The fear can be constant. At first, it only reminds you on your birthday. Then it reminds you again on all birthday parties you attend. As you age, you might start to question yourself more and more frequently.

The pro and cons of DINK lifestyle